We shouldn't have to expose our traumas publicly to get respect. Framing abortion as traumatic isn't the whole truth. Usually abortion is an obvious, healthy, angst-free choice. Trust me, a lot of women who don't want to be pregnant don't agonize the choice. My abortion was the product of rape, my decision was CLEAR, I have no shame, zip zero. Yes, it required emotional processing but ok, I'm not haunted. It didn't fuck me up like being raped fucked me up, duh. It was a choice toward FREEDOM, and I'm happy I had it to take.

Framing abortion as "agonizing" is a tactic to make choice palatable to people morally opposed to choice. Waste of time, and disingenuous. It's the same philosophy behind, "we don't want to take all your guns," or, "we don't care who you vote for, just vote!" Honest communication isn't wishy washy. Tell the truth. I do want to take away all the guns, I don't want people who vote for Nazis to vote, and autonomy over my body isn't agonizing - it's LIBERATING. This is more vulnerable & riskier than the "apologetic" way, but an authentic life is best. I'm not so naive as to think this culture will ever evolve into one that doesn't have guns or Nazis, and recognizes women/black indigenous AAPI people/LGBTQIA+ as full, free, equal human beings  - but it's what I want and I'm not sorry.